Apr 01 2008
The Real World Vancouver
We have re-applied for another year of visas in Ye Ol Canada. The Donor has a work visa, the kids have study visas, and my visa, to paraphrase, says, “May not do anything but sit on your ass and eat Bon Bons. Also, pay taxes. Thank you.”
In all seriousness, I have a very restrictive visa. No schooling, no work, no nothing. I am fixin’ to change that, though.
I have re-applied with a CHANGE OF STATUS. I am asking Canada, very nicely, with cherries and whipped cream and evenly chopped nuts and stuff, to let me work or let me go to school. Why? Because after 9 years of working and trying to raise a family, dreaming of the day I could just be a full time stay at home momma, I got my wish. For 10 months now, thanks to a visa, I have been forced to stay home.
Dude, I hate it. It’s making me crazy.
Well, maybe I do kind of like it, but I have no schedule, no structure, no nothing. I have absolutely no reason to make sure the laundry gets done every day, because god knows I’m going to be here all day again tomorrow.
I have a serious case of I’ll-get-to-it-when-I-get-to-it-itis.
Here’s where you come in. I think I want to get a job. I want to go to school, too, but I really want a job. A real job. A job that does not involve knowing every vintage of wine, or every variety of scotch, or which regions make the best cigars, or whether sunny side up eggs go better with hash or bacon. (Truth be told, they’re all handy to know, especially that last one.)
Read: No restaurants. Ever. EVER AGAIN.
What kind of job should I look for? I have held a random assortment of jobs in my day (here and here and some of them) but I’ve never had anything careery. I want something careery. For those of you smart enough too lazy to click the links, I’ll give you the synopsis of my work history, thereby giving you an idea of what I might be capable of doing:
- I’ve done a bunch of Numbery work. I’ve done accounting for restaurants, balanced books for Bounty Hunters, worked at a bank for a while, etc. I am freakishly good with numbers. And I look crazy hot in a suit.
- I have waited tables at every god damn end of the restaurant spectrum. Most of those restaurants I have ended up running to some degree, rather quickly. I am a fast learner.
- Oh, yeah, there was that 2 week gig at the gas station that turned into 2 years. Good times.
- …and, I opened and managed an indie video store. With a porn room. Coolest. Job. Ever.
That’s it. So, if you were an idiot who never went to college and had squandered away her best years dicking about at pointless yet colorful jobs, where would you start looking in the career-department? And if you tell me to write the Great American Novel, you’d better damn well provide me with the story line. You wouldn’t be the first person to say, “Oh, I don’t know…just write about stuff. You describe things well.” Um, that’s not helpful.
Comments close after 14 days. And there's Captcha if you're nasty. 47 Comments to “The Real World Vancouver”
Wow! That’s my job history. Mostly.
-Comic book store–fantastic
-waitress/cashier/hostess/etc–yeah, you know
-banker-I’ll never get that 7 years back
-accounts receivable supervisor-currently
Sorry, no advice. Just sharing. I don’t have a degree either. I just applied for everything I thought I might qualify for and took one that made me a good offer. A hot suit for the interview doesn’t hurt.
Jennifer’s last blog post..Yes, I Can Take a Hint
I went through a lot of career counseling at one point. Basically, it comes down to this:
1. What do you want to do?
2. What skills do you already have?
3. Where do those things intersect?
4. Find people who do that stuff already and talk to them a lot about how they got there.
5. Go apply to every goddamn job you come across that even remotely matches any of these items.
Big help, huh?
That’s the easiest question in the whole wide world. You need to apply at http://www.vancouvereconomic.com/ when they have an opening. In the meantime, call them and ask to volunteer. You can volunteer to call on existing industry and collect a data base. Also volunteer at the Chamber of Commerce. Then you can sink your claws in them and take over the world. Volunteer at first to get your feet wet. (That’s a duck thing). That industry was made for you perfect. What a softball question. Throw me something harder.
Audubon Ron’s last blog post..Open ended
How do you feel about tuturing those with less fortunate math skills? There’s even online tutoring now. My boss loves tutorvista for her son.
April’s last blog post..Balancing Racial Identity
Duh - I meant tutoring, not tuturing. Consider me someone w/ less fortunate typing skills!
April’s last blog post..Balancing Racial Identity
Good Luck with Job Hunting. I always think that when its the job for you, you will just know it.
If your search gets desperate, you can help me with my windows. Also, I hate changing my litter boxes. Peace.
Unless you thoroughly enjoy doing it, I wouldn’t suggest cleaning. That only gives you more reason not to clean when you are home (I do it all day at work!). In my case, all night, but anyway, it gets old after a while. I love cleaning, at work, but at home I don’t do as much. Maybe because I’m not getting paid at home.
Sue’s last blog post..I Kick Sponge Bath Ass
Well…my husband told me I should become a porn star. And since I don’t plan to do anything with that um…helpful…bit of advice, you can have it. Haha.
My husband…yes my HUSBAND also suggested I do private lingerie shows where we invited men to our home to sell lingerie (he found a company with no start up cost that supplies the lingerie)…and I would have to model it. So, my smart ass self says “Why don’t I just make them buy it off me? Charge like 500 bucks for crap?” Yeh…bad idea. He liked the idea.
Not doing it. Ever. So there…you can have those two.
Oh..you wanted REAL helpful ideas? Ummm…how about looking into management with something? bed and breakfast, hotels, restaurants (you said none of these…but you would be on the other side of things…sort of)…or whatnot…
You could be a nanny…I hear it pays decent. -Ish.
Or…my favorite. A hit-man. what better way to rid yourself of the day’s frustrations? Literally? But, if that borders too far over your moral compass…I guess there is always Private Investigator.
Ashley Sanders’s last blog post..Well, Flippity Doo Dah
When you have all the answers, let me know. This stay-at-home mom gig has turned my brain to mush. I have no clue what to do productively with life, but if you want to know the VeggieTales theme song… I’m your girl.
AmyM’s last blog post..And on the 2nd day?
I was GONNA suggest writing too, but that’s been taken I see…
er… MOOSE grooming?
Xbox4NappyRash’s last blog post..Walking the walk
Just please don’t get into insurance.
You would be fabulous at so many things, dude. Talk to Sarah. Also? I think you should consider something where you would be client-facing. A customer service that isn’t a call center.
Very nonspecific, and all, but just take my advice on the insurance thing.
molly_g’s last blog post..ha ha heh
Okay, your own personal librarian to the rescue. Go to your local library. Canada has pretty good libraries, they’ll be nice to you. Tell the nice librarian at the Information or Reference desk that you are thinking of a career change and want books on career ideas. There are entire series of books that talk about careers without a degree. There are ones just for people who like numbers, seriously. Just go ask. Then you’ll have a whole book worth of ideas to browse through and you can put off the laundry for at least a whole day while you do so. :)
Turtle’s last blog post..There are some things you shouldn’t do while manning the reference desk…
lady, i fully suggest doing bookkeeping and working under the table. fully. you can still dress up. you can make your own hours. you can do the number thing. you can rule the world, tax free. (sort of)
zoeyjane’s last blog post..Spent, Just Spent.
I am sooo glad you asked; but you’ll be soooo sorry I answered.
1. Public street namer.
2. Roadside pet turtle sales.
3. Exotic dancing pole tester.
4. Pirate.
or
5. President.
Your high school guidance counselor probably gave you the same list.
… So does Canada know you are a freestylin’ internet blogging superstar? Ooooh! Busted!
anne nahm’s last blog post..I am Actually the Normal One in My Family
PS: Canada says, “get back in the kitchen and make my dinner!”
anne nahm’s last blog post..I am Actually the Normal One in My Family
Well damn you already took my answers. For what its worth I am a college graduate and I did every job you did except for waitressing.
I still work part time at home when a job comes up (accounting) but I long to get out of my pj’s and talk to adults on a daily basis.
Maybe someday. (sigh)
Kay’s last blog post..Nobody’s Fool
I got nothing. What are you going to do with the little one? Will it pay to work before she’s in school?
I’m a great example that volunteering can pay off in more ways than you even imagined. How about working at a school?
Diane’s last blog post..Crazy busy
I applaud you on wanting to get back into the workforce. I myself have no desire. I am looking forward to the day when the little one starts kindergarten and I told Hubs I am taking the year off watching soaps and eating bon bons because I have earned that right. And then I’ll probably get bored and go work at Barnes and Noble or something because I have no skills, I just need to be somewhere with an employee discount.
amy’s last blog post..Abby’s Birth Story
The first year I was here I had one of those ‘no work’ visas.
OH MY CHRIST. I thought I’d go INSANE.
There are a lot of courses you can take over the internet. (Which I don’t THINK count towards the ‘no school’ thing.)I’m taking a Medical Terminology course right now - the hospitals around here demand it - even though my job has very little to do with terminology. But if you can’t decide what to do right away, the hospitals are a good (and pretty well-paying!) place to go figure it out.
daysgoby’s last blog post..pink is the new black
I used to be a fancy pants executive type of person. Became an alcoholic, had to go to treatment, and now I’m a secretary for a plastic surgeon. I LOVE IT! Who would have thought?
I feel like I was given the opportunity to start my life over and try new things. You might be at the same point. I get to try new things every day. Surgical assisting, insurance filing, counseling (for breast cancer patients) medical coding, and all kinds of stuff. Plus, there will always be jobs in healthcare.
k8’s last blog post..It’s the Little Things…
Hopefully they’ll let ya get a ‘not sitting on your butt’ visa! Which part of Canada are you in again?(i’m spacing my brain is thinking about my trip up there permanately until the end of the week).
Mackenzie’s Momma’s last blog post..Snow snow go away!
Whoa… that is so weird.
I just looked at my kids ten minutes and screamed, “I am done with you. I am going to work tomorrow!!!”
They cried. But I am seriously thinking about it.
ohmommy’s last blog post..Desperate Housewives of the Midwestern Tundra
I’m in the process of deciding to go back to teaching, so in a way I totally get how you’re feeling. I’ve only been on this gig for 8 months and I’m already itchy.
Do you want to work from home? Part time? Full time?
Small companies are a great place to start–obviously you can write, so marketing copy, PR stuff, bookkeeping is a for sure thing . . . just ask around at your favorite hang outs (like a adult film store :) or book store, coffee shops–cool ones, of course, clothing stores (DISCOUNTS!–and if you don’t want to be a salesperson, consider merchandising) . . .
If you want to work from home, virtual assistants are a hot thing right now (ooohhh, and you with your mad numbery skills). A friend of mine lives in Toronto and is working two part-time telecommuting jobs (she doesn’t need the benefits–so she had it easy in picking and choosing). Just a quick search and you might come across some in your area . . .
Finally, WHY not writing? You have a flair for words, so try writing articles for online sites and maybe even magazines. Writer’s Market has a great listing of EVERY magazine you could imagine. You have a body (and a nice one at that) of work right here online.
Good luck . . . and let us know how the search goes.
LaskiGal’s last blog post..I’m Gettin’ the Band Back Together & a Monday Meme!
um. no great ideas come to mind, but you might get some inspiration here:
http://www.amazon.com/Careers-Crime-Applicants-Michael-Weinberg/dp/0740757083/ref=pd_bbs_sr_1?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1207088872&sr=8-1
i’m just sayin’….
the planet of janet’s last blog post..Entering the 21st century — kicking and screaming
i had a temp job that was five hours a day answering client phones, putting in orders. v. fast paced, but at 3 p.m., i got to clock out. no rush hour to fight, no worries about evaluations. they appreciate you for being there as long as you are doing the job right.
so call some temp agencies and see what they have to say. the fun thing is, if you sign up with one agency (i would sign up with two or three) you can do fun jobs, filling in as needed on a pretty regular basis. but make sure you call them daily for assignments for a while, after that, they’ll be calling you.
i worked at a high school photocopy center for four days and met some real cool teachers. plus i realized just how much paper schools consume (translate waste) and how many trees they kill on a daily basis. v. distressing.
but i got paid and then on to the next assignment. look into it for sure….it keeps things changing and that’s nice.
You could come work for me. Um, doing stuff. And um, making sure no one disturbs me. Yea.
Michigan is almost Canada. ….
Failing that? Temp jobs are great to get out of the house and try different things. Or bank teller?
Ree’s last blog post..Workin
I’d probably go back into the portrait studio world, but that’s just me. However, I’d be more willing to do so if it were my own studio. Hmmmmm…this is the plan anyway…someday…
Good luck to you and your endeavors; you’re bound for greatness, regardless of what it is. Of this I am certain!
Secret Agent Mama’s last blog post..Project 365 (222/365)
Didn’t want you to think I was reading and not answering, because you know me — I loves to give advice. And I’m always right. So you should love to take it from me.
But this one I actually want to think about a bit. And since I’ve been at work for 13 hours now, I think it’s time for me to go home.
I will think while driving (and avoiding hitting any deer) and get back to you.
With something brilliant. Obviously.
MommyTime’s last blog post..I Apparently Need More Goals
I’ve been thinking about this myself. I am glad that you’re freakishly good with numbers…Hmm…Bookkeeping, accounting, marketing?
Loralee’s last blog post..Sideblog: I can’t decide if this is serious or an April Fools? joke?
K. I suck in the career department. I can’t really seem to find one I’m happy with myself. I just had to say also suffer from “I
Advice Columnist. Seriously.
Mas Younon’s last blog post..For the American People
Will need to email my response to this, seeing as this is what I’m doing for a living AND what I’m doing on the side. But I think I can help you when the time comes. I hope I can, anyway. I seem to have a knack with it. And I agree with Molla–client facing customer service would be your strong suit. But you have options, for sure. We’ll figure it out. I promise.
Wow! The indie video store sounds awesome…I bet you met some, um, interesting people.
I have a master’s degree in speech pathology, but sadly I still have no idea what I want to be when I grow up.
Jennifer’s last blog post..This Post Brought to You By the Makers of Poise Pads
My job history isn’t nearly as exciting. Retail and kitchen work. BORING.
That said, I waled up the road yesterday and asked for a job at the pub. Being a SAHM is driving me insane.
Veronica’s last blog post..Good Reading
Waled up the road? No, I walked. Not nearly as exciting.
Veronica’s last blog post..Good Reading
I here those Canadian strippers do well!
Tammy’s last blog post..There must be an easier way to “tackle” this….
I don’t know you well enough (or read enough of your blog) to be of any help in this are. First of all, when I had my babies, (4 separate time) I stayed home 3 - 4 months with all of them. Nursing. I got up, cleaned, did laundry, fed the baby, bathed the baby, exercised, and by noon, I was so freaking totally bored I would actually (gasp) watch soap operas! Of course, I also got addicted to the Game Show Network.
If I weren’t working where I am, (for 13 long years) I’m with you. I have no freaking clue what I would want to do. But I like they one idea of managing a hotel or something. That would be cool!
Robina’s last blog post..More stories of a 5 year old.
Temp-work, maybe? That way you can work yourself back in without too much responsibility? I temped around in the past and enjoyed working at places for short periods of time. That way, one never stay past the “honeymoon” period and hardly anyone has a chance to get on one’s nerves! It’s a thought!
calicobebop’s last blog post..Old MacDonald had a … chicken nugget?
Have you considered a news column? I picture a mommy’s version of sex in the city…very chic!
You are an awesome writer, but those jobs just don’t materialize without luck and a rockin resume.
You are smokin hot, but as a feminisit, I can bring myself to suggest pole dancing.
I’d say liquor store, but you would just guzzle away the profits.
I don’t really know, hon. Although, whatever it is you decide, you will rock at it.
Seriously, you are one smart bitch.
I’ll trade you my teaching job for your stay-at-home gig any time.
Good Luck
Kelly’s last blog post..When Love Is Complicated
You are now officially one of my heroes. I want so badly to move to Canada. Since I already hold the title of official SAHM I wouldn’t be too inclined to work but good for you for having the desire. I think you should just get paid to blog.
Ashley’s last blog post..The Physics of a Toddler on a Tricycle
So… does Boba Fett give Xmas bonuses, or is he a tightwad like people say?
Real job suggestion coming up:
Content manager for a website. Most sites have caught on that in order to rank well on Google searches they need to keep updating content. Most will put up a lame blog to do it. This is where you come in. In my present job search, I’m coming across this more and more.
BusyDad’s last blog post..Removing “Landscaping” From My CareerBuilder.com Search
I think BusyDad’s suggestion is great, and I would think hard, if I were you, about how you might parlay your web skills and people skills into a career.
For the web content manager angle, per se, you could start by checking out some of the good mom sites that draw on the blogging crowd but aren’t individual blogs. Make phone calls and set up appointments for informational interviews (which can happen over the phone) to talk to them about who manages their content and how. This will give you some sense of the job, as well as of the range.
Think, too, about what kinds of sites you might like to work for. Then work on tailoring your resume based on SKILLS rather than JOB HISTORY. This way you can emphasize attention to detail, multi-tasking, copy-editing, etc., as well as web and html skills without providing a laundry-list of bars you’ve worked in.
Honestly, I’d work on the resume descriptions of your skill sets before picking some career paths, as those will help dictate.
Also think more broadly about places that might want someone with your skills, and might be dying for someone with really good web ability. Good places to approach, that might be more willing to consider hiring someone with lots of “real world” experience rather than a degree: non-profit agencies (esp. if you’re talking about being web-savvy as opposed to fund-raising savvy, which is a skill they are up to their eyeballs in); arts organizations such as local theaters; childcare companies; places that do public programming such as local libraries or community centers.
Another cool career I know a few people have gotten into is teaching Baby Signs — a modified version of American Sign Language for use with hearing infants and toddlers. It’s a fabulous program, with a reasonably short training session that leads to instant credentials — and then you can run classes at daycare centers, community centers, libraries, etc.
“Writer” is too nebulous, too difficult, too tortured as a short-term goal. But you could begin to build a portfolio for yourself by becoming a regular columnist on sites with an interest in content for moms. That, too, while it might not pay, would add credibility to a resume that focuses on web savvy and ability to manage an organization’s content/site.
If you want to chat about any of this, or if I’m rambling pointlessly, drop me a line. :)
MommyTime’s last blog post..Dreaming of Giraffes
Actually, columnist on multiple sites, not all of which are aimed at moms, would be even better. A foodie one, a mom one, and a nerdly/brainiac one of some kind would be an excellent mix.
MommyTime’s last blog post..Dreaming of Giraffes
Well, you know, I think nurse and midwife sounds like something you might like. I’m not biased at all…noooo!
tiff’s last blog post..Reflections.
Oh jesus. I have no clue. What are the hot industries in Canada? Maybe a job at the local newspaper? Public relations guru? Event planner? Daycare…ha kidding. I’m not helping very much.
Tootsie Farklepants’s last blog post..Senseo. I’ll Give You a Hint: It’s not a Ninja