Jun 22 2008
Rate the Hate the Kraft Cheese and Macaroni Edition
How to get Kraft Dinner served actually for dinner in 20 easy steps:
- Send daddy out of town for 4 days. Make sure he doesn’t get one single day off of work for 2 weeks straight upon his return.
- Find a way to give your little sister shingles. While your dad’s out of town.
- Decide that $10 isn’t worth it anymore, and stop doing ALL of your chores.
- Make sure dad works late every night, keeping mom up past midnight every night waiting for him to get home. Get her on a good schedule.
- But still need to be dressed, fed and at school by 8:55 am every day.
- Work it out so that your little brothers gets good and beat up on the playground at school.
- Guilt your mother into thinking that it’s somehow her fault for making him the middle child, and then send her to Science World to try & buy his love. After a long meeting with the principal, of course.
- All with your little sister.
- Who is two.
- At naptime.
- Go on a field trip while mom and siblings are at Science World. Smash your foot into something.
- Go to doctor’s office, then to the Radiology department at hospital with mom, little brother, and little sister.
- Who is two.
- At bedtime.
- Feed your little sister a rock of crack cocaine, ensuring that she will not sleep anytime before 2 am.
- Drag your mom out of bed the next morning for Little League practice, make her take you to get crutches, and then take all of you for haircuts, and then the grocery store, all without dad but with your little brother and your little sister.
- Who is two.
- Over lunchtime and naptime.
- Remind your almost-comatose mother at 6:30pm that children have to eat in order to continue not dying.
- Feast upon your Kraft Dinner.
Comments close after 5 days. Spam sucks. 35 Comments to “Rate the Hate the Kraft Cheese and Macaroni Edition”
Oh, now we really have to run away together. We could both use a little Mexico, doncha think?
Fawn’s last blog post..Day 6 at home
um, so you’re saying that if i wack 1 of 3 in the foot at the end of the summer, during naptime, you’ll make me some KD? thanks, dude!
Zoeyjane’s last blog post..Is a whole post actually needed to express this?
My kids don’t have to work that hard for Kraft Mac and Cheese.
HRH’s last blog post..Zooming in for fun…
Oh sheesh. I hope next weeks better.
And uh, did you intentionally number it like that?
Natalie’s last blog post..The Thing About ANWR Drilling
weeks is supposed to say week IS.
Natalie’s last blog post..The Thing About ANWR Drilling
Dude, send your kids my way. We have Kraft Dinner (Mac n Cheese) (blue box only, no substitutes thankyouverymuch) on a fairly regualar basis. Or THEY do anyway.
KEEP BELIEVING
Angie’s last blog post..Next Stop…. Hilton Head
Kraft Mac n Cheese sounds really good right now. Now what do you do when your kids don’t like it, but you do?!?
April’s last blog post..BlogBlast for Education
You win.
Not sure what, but you win.
A Whole Lot of Nothing’s last blog post..Weekly Winners 4.15 - 4.21
I’m sorry. All I can say.
Latte Mommy’s last blog post..Trade Ya!
We eat Kraft Mac n cheese for breakfast lunch AND dinner daily…just say’n….
Tammy’s last blog post..Big Hair 101
Dude, I hate to tell you, it ain’t gonna get any better either. My kids are teenagers, and what did they eat Friday night because after this particular week with them, I had no internal reserves left? Kraft Macaroni and Cheese. Albeit the single serve ones they can cook for themselves, but the end result is the same.
Suze’s last blog post..6 Word Memoir Meme
Ready to run away with me now? I am thinking the Caribbean looks nice. We could get ourselves a pool boy and a couple of personal trainers to show us what we should be doing, while they are nekkid, and we are sucking down copious amounts of alcohol with slices of fruit on the side. Dipped in chocolate…
Smootches babe. Really really big smootches.
Kelley’s last blog post..So I am sitting here drunk.
K to the D! those were the days…..If only the damn stuff wouldn’t put ThingTwo in the ground. (dairy allergy, BAH!) Thing One has to go to her friends house to get that shit. I remember having an entire cupboard of the perfect blue boxes. Half the pay cheque went to KD the other half to beer…..
Dude! Your daughter takes crack too?
Matt’s last blog post..Preemies - Are They Worth The Cost?
Dude, I would have been feeding them Kraft Dinners too. If I knew what they were.
My standby is always 2 minute noodles. If I am feeling extra guilty I will throw some frozen peas into them too.
Veronica’s last blog post..Bigger and Bigger
ugh!! i hope things start to get better around your house soon! :) HUGS!!
Jennifer’s last blog post..More Pictures…
Kraft Mac and Cheese and a vitamin (to assuage your guilt). Good eats!
Wait, wait. Pause. So, what’s wrong with kraft mac and cheese? The velveeta kind tastes better btw, worse for you…but tastes better.
Sorry you’ve had a rough week. *hugs*
Ashley’s last blog post..My Soul Truth (as it stands, right now)
Oh, lovely, it HAS been a week of hell for you, hasn’t it?
Are there any summer camps in your future?
(Okay, I meant for the kids, but now I think a summer camp idea for moms would be AWESOME.)
daysgoby’s last blog post..clippings
Kraft has saved many a day. They should get some sort of reward.
dysfunctional mom’s last blog post..Today, I had a chauffeur.
Wow, you so need a vacation and some serious sleep.
Diane’s last blog post..Hacked?
Love it!
nottryingforaboy’s last blog post..Veggie Box #1
Oh no.
Man those middle children! Hope his foot heals fast. ;)
ohmommy’s last blog post..The post where I am completely honest and loose all my readers.
You get points for making something that requires cooking. If I were you, I’d have fed them cereal.
Stacey’s last blog post..Reality Check
Mac and Cheese. Momma’s Little Helper? Nah, that’s vodka. XX
Ree’s last blog post..RIP Scott Kalitta
He’s a gotdamn genius he is.
Maria’s last blog post..Protected: Dance, Dance.
oh yeah. he’s got that one nailed perfectly!
although my kids now make that stuff themselves. just for yucks.
or maybe it’s because i won’t cook.
or something.
the planet of janet’s last blog post..Weekly Winners: June 15-21
It’s the cheesiest!!!!
K8spade’s last blog post..You Might Be a Redneck…
De-lurking to say I love your blog. and would like some whiskey in my cup, too. lol
Autumn’s last blog post..Tag!
Oh, damn. I feel bad for you. That stinks. However? I am glad his foot is okay! Well, I assume it was okay because he still went to Little League. Was it broken?
PS. last night? 2am? I was reading, well…trying to. So you WERE a tease!!!
J’s last blog post..I suck, y’all.
All mine has to say is “I’m hungry mo-” and I’m already heating up the water.
Dude, try the delux. Its so bomb.
Miss’s last blog post..Classy Chaos Challenge #1
Hm, all mine have to do is say, “When is dinner?” We should own STOCK. And I hate it, I really, really do. Glad he is okay, though.
Kori’s last blog post..BlogBlast For Education: It Starts Here
Mmm…. S & M Macaroni… Hope it is already better. I’m scared to go into your PTA comments. I haven’t lost my cherry there yet.
anne nahm’s last blog post..That’s Not Part of My ?Unconditional Love? Contract
I think the frozen Swanson Macaroni and cheese is tastier. You should try it next time.
Neil’s last blog post..What Would Sophia Do?
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