“Where are we going, momma?” she asked me two night ago from the backseat of the car. “Home, baby”, I answered. “Are we going to our new Texas house?” she squeaked softly from her carseat, and I told her we were. “Momma, dats not my home.”
*gulp*
“Where is your home, babycakes?” “My bwue house is my home, wif my green woom. It’s empty.”
Yes, yes it is, love.
She misses her home. She can ‘t remember the house in Denver that we lived in until she was 6 months old, she can’t remember the little two bedroom apartment her brothers and I called home for a little over a year while her dad and I sorted our shit out, separately; all she knows in life is Moorside Place; the stairs, the yellow living room walls, her Granny Smith green bedroom walls, her white bed that we left behind for a new little baby who will need a crib when he’s born. This is just some place full of boxes that we’ve crashed in for a while.
Home is where her gerbil is, and her gerbil isn’t in America.
We’re trying to do everything we can to make this as easy on them as possible. We spent every day of our 2+ weeks in the hotel at the pool, even the really cold, rainy ones, I haven’t enrolled the boys in school yet, I got them cell phones, 3of3 has spent every single night in my bed, and I bought them every nasty, evil, food-coloring-soaked, marshmallow-laden, not really food at all breakfast cereal on the market. Because if their life is going to be torn asunder, I think they should at least get to eat some Count Chocula while it happens.
It’s worked, so far.
We’ve spent these 3 weeks since we moved together, just the 5 of us, burrowed into each other making cardboard houses, watching so many movies, slowly unpacking, and laughing like we’re hopped up on sugar dipped food coloring. It’s been nice, but real life has to resume at some point.
Eventually, this house has to become home. And 3of3 doesn’t even have a bed yet.
So yesterday, after my kid informed me that this isn’t her home, I got on the horn with the eight thousand doctors and schools to get all the vaccination records and school records I’ll need to get the boys back in school. I took them to Petsmart and let them buy a new gerbil, whom we’ve named Theodore. (Shut up, Molly & Marge, gerbils are heartier. It shall live. DAMMIT.) I opened a few of 3of3′s boxes and dug out some clothes and toys. I went to the grocery store and bought more than beer and Apple Jacks. And last night, I took 3of3 with me to the Kirtsy Takes a Bow book signing where she made a new friend whom she wrestled with, got into a fight with, resolved that fight with and decided that he could be her new best friend fowrevowr.
And through sleepy eyes and tired words on our way back, she asked, “Momma, where we go now?” and I said that we were going back to our house. She said, “Are we going to my red home, momma?” and I smiled. Yes, little girl, we are going to your red home.
And now, to buy some fucking GRANOLA…
Tagged with: 3of3, coming to america, moving
Angella
Wednesday, 18 November, 2009 at 10:25I still can’t believe that you’re so far away. Boo.
Glad you’re slowly getting settled, though. xoxo
BusyDad
Wednesday, 18 November, 2009 at 10:29Home IS indeed where the sugar is.
TeacherMommy
Wednesday, 18 November, 2009 at 10:31Oh, it’s hard. It’s hard. I moved a lot in my life, so I get that feeling of homelessness. And even though my boys currently get to stay in their home while their father and I are the ones to move in and out, eventually that damn house will go (it will, dammit, somehow) and they will live between two homes, somewhere, somehow.
For now, I am the one feeling homeless as I move between a house I only tolerate because my boys are there, my boyfriend’s place (which feels more home than anywhere else) and once in a blue moon the apartment I supposedly share on and off with the ex. And who knows how long this will last.
I’m glad you’re taking the steps you need to make the new house HOME for you all. Even if that does mean they have to go back to school…
Half the Story
Wednesday, 18 November, 2009 at 10:31Great blog, super reading.
Jessi
Wednesday, 18 November, 2009 at 10:43We’ve lived in our house for two years last week and my daughter still asks me when we are going back to the blue house. The one with the fairies on the wall and the pond in the back yard. She makes it sound so romantic. I’d like to remind her that those walls with the fairies were only 8 feet apart and her new wallls, covered with princesses are 12 feet apart, that the backyard with the pond was the size of a postage stamp and our new backyard is two acres. That the old home was someone else’s and we just paid to live there and the new home is ours, forever and forever. But I know she won’t understand. It’s so hard.
Good luck.
BIG RED
Wednesday, 18 November, 2009 at 10:43How I miss my sweet little Jersey sounding princess.
I’m glad she’s starting to like her red home.
Because it looks beautiful.
I love ya.
justsomethoughts
Wednesday, 18 November, 2009 at 10:52beautiful sad and beautiful
Avitable
Wednesday, 18 November, 2009 at 11:37Home is where the vagina is. I think that’s how the saying goes.
kootnygirl
Wednesday, 18 November, 2009 at 11:56How can I not even know you, and still wish that you would/come back here where you belong?
On the other hand, seeing that house, I think maybe I want to move THERE!
EarnestGirl
Wednesday, 18 November, 2009 at 12:43Lovely post. I burrowed in it. Buried my nose and sniffed hard. Your new Texas house seems gorgeous. Maybe eventually even nutritious. It’ll be good when you get some beds. I’ll come jump on them. The floor was pretty, but hard to roll around on.
Just so’s you know? If you do come back to the land of diamond-shaped Shreddies, you can take my picture. A lot of times.
sigh.
Happy nesting sweet.
Zakary
Wednesday, 18 November, 2009 at 13:30I like the red house. Good luck, the gerbil is sure to ease the pain.
Keyona
Wednesday, 18 November, 2009 at 13:34It’s gawgeous! I hope you all settle in well…I know it’s been hard on all of you. *HUGS*
MidLifeMama
Wednesday, 18 November, 2009 at 13:35UGH. I moved a lot as a kid. It sucked. I think about how it would be to do that with my Cooper now. I don’t think I gave my parents enough credit for making the hard decision to move us because it was the right thing to do in the long run even though it broke our hearts.
But seriously – TEXAS??? You know it doesn’t snow there, right? It is hot there. There are bugs the size of your head there.
The good news is kids are resilient, and for better or worse I learned to make friends quickly because we moved a lot. Good luck!
Jennifer
Wednesday, 18 November, 2009 at 14:00TEXAS?!?!?
Woman, we are practically neighbors now. We must get together for that drink. Don’t worry, I won’t make you shoot anything. At least not on the first date :)
Jaina
Wednesday, 18 November, 2009 at 14:01I wrote this nice long comment and then the stupid internet ate it. Someone should call tech support. Oh wait, that’s me. Oh well.
I’m glad things are coming together…the house looks great!
mn
Wednesday, 18 November, 2009 at 14:23beautiful house, hopefully a beautiful beginning
Jeanette
Wednesday, 18 November, 2009 at 15:44Love the look of the red home :) glad 3of3 said home and not house!
un
Wednesday, 18 November, 2009 at 16:14lovely words..lovely pictures ….health andhappiness in your new home and life .
Cori
Wednesday, 18 November, 2009 at 16:19*squee* You’re in TEXAS! Like, the state where I live!
Ok, now that that’s out of my system. I understand. We’ve moved every year since Hubs and I have moved in together. When my parents got divorced and sold my childhood home, I didn’t feel like I had a home anymore.
But I’ve learned that home is where my kid is. No matter where that is.
Enjoy Texas. Even us Yankees like it sometimes.
[c]
April
Wednesday, 18 November, 2009 at 16:39It sounds like you’re doing all you can to ease the pain. Not make it painless, that’s not really possible, but you’re there to ease the pain.
I totally remember our first night in L.A., eating pizza and sleeping on mattresses. I love that memory. I’m confident in 20 years, you’ll all be reminiscing about these 3 weeks with much joy.
And by then, I hope you’ve left TX and are living here in California, where I know you belong.
Catherine
Wednesday, 18 November, 2009 at 16:44Dude. You’re from Colorado and you moved to TEXAS? You know better than to drive up here with your TX plates in the dead of winter, right? It won’t matter that you know *how* to drive in the snow – we’ll still blame you for anything that might happen on the roads.
Happy unpacking! Glad you made it there safely.
Lee of MWOB
Wednesday, 18 November, 2009 at 16:51That is soooooo a Mr. Lady home…..it seems just perfect. :-)
Home is where mama is baby….and that’s that.
pixielation
Wednesday, 18 November, 2009 at 16:55Having a friend makes things easier. And the fact that she said “my red home” means you’ve got over the biggest hurdle.
And that photo of the empty house is so emotive, rich – warm and yet lonely. Is that the old house?
Mishi
Wednesday, 18 November, 2009 at 18:36Live there in love, health, and happiness. Congratulations!
Jan
Wednesday, 18 November, 2009 at 18:46I’ve only been to Texas once, if you count a frantic end-to-end dash through the Houston airport. My mom, however, claims that Texas = armpit. In the sweatiest sense.
Good luck.
Julie
Wednesday, 18 November, 2009 at 19:14Moving is so hard on little ones… We’ve moved more times than the years we’ve been married! I hate moving.
She’ll come around though, sounds like she already is!!! You’re doing right by them… indulging for awhile!
MommyTime
Wednesday, 18 November, 2009 at 20:28Ok, and I’m serious about this: you COULD have moved closer to me, you know. But, on the upside I have applied to two conferences in Texas for the spring, and while it’s a crap shoot whether I’ll get in, and an even bigger crap shoot whether they’ll be anywhere NEAR where you actually live, a girl can dream, can’t she? So, what are you cooking for me when I ditch the conference and come over? :)
Thinking of you and hoping everyone else is settling in a little bit too.
Jennifer A
Wednesday, 18 November, 2009 at 22:13Beautiful. Glad things are working, although you do need furniture.
and make sure the cage is escape proof. We’re still looking for a missing hamster.
sam {temptingmama}
Thursday, 19 November, 2009 at 7:58Canada is not the same without you. :(
So glad that 3of3 is adjusting to her new home. Carter took about a month and he’s adjusted very well. *hugs*
xox
TRACI
Thursday, 19 November, 2009 at 8:05Goddamn I miss home. I miss Texas like you can’t imagine. But this was about children and moving them. Far, far away. We are on relo numero dos, this time 1500 hundred miles from Texas. And you know what? The kids do great. Better than us. And it is SO cool to be the new kid in the middle of the year. It beats being the new kids at the beginning of the year, while you haven’t met kids to play with all summer long and you are just lost in the crowd and confusion of first day jitters for everyone. We are firm believers in middle year moves.
FUCK. I miss Texas.
hubs
Thursday, 19 November, 2009 at 12:02Wow, you’re rich! That place is huge!
At least Texas is a little closer than Canada, a little closer to home.
ShredderFeeder
Thursday, 19 November, 2009 at 13:32My father retired from the military before i was born, but never quite got the god damned “I’m going to move ever 18-24 months” shit out of his blood.
I survived. I thrived. Yours will too.
Welcome back, I figure if Canada was stupid enough to throw you out, they don’t deserve you. (Though I’m not sure I would have picked ANYWHERE in Texas as a landing zone. :)
colleen
Thursday, 19 November, 2009 at 17:43All i can say is
AWWWWW. ((hug)) omg and a little *sniff*. but your red home. yay to her red home.
xo
Kelley @ Magnetoboldtoo
Thursday, 19 November, 2009 at 23:10Oh sweetie.
I kinda love the red house, is there a room for me?
Pam
Friday, 20 November, 2009 at 14:15Welcome to Texas.
I lived my whole life in Alameda County, CA until about 4 years ago and decided to carpe diem and wound up here w/ my family.
I don’t know how it compares to Canada, but in comparison to California, Texas was a very positive change. The schools are WAY better, the people (southerners in general) are WAY nicer, the cost of living is much more reasonable.
It’s been GREAT. I hope Texas is as good to you and your family as it’s been for us.
anya
Friday, 20 November, 2009 at 18:25Nice digs.
My son talked about his “old” house for a long time. We still talk about all the fun memories we had there. That’s what she’s missing.
Amo
Friday, 20 November, 2009 at 18:40We moved from TN to NC almost a year ago and my 5 year old has asked, “When are we moving back” almost weekly. It’s hard on them, but they’ll survive.
Good on you for picking yourself up and getting the ball rolling on the settling part. I sucked at that.
momma sajeeda
Friday, 20 November, 2009 at 20:54OMG!!! What a beautiful place. That should feel like home in no time! Its so BIG!!! We miss you terribly but seeing your new home makes me happy, kinda like I have another home in another country. Cause you know you’ll always be my soul sister.
Much love to you all!!!!
Kath
Saturday, 21 November, 2009 at 10:58DUDE!! Wow…WTF???? DUDE???
Since the last 3 months of my life have been taken up with selling my home & moving (whoa, common thread!) I decided to catch up on blogs this fine CO morning. And now I am sitting here getting all WTF-y cause I had no earthly idea you were going thru all this shit.
CRAP!
Sending you good vibes from CO & cross-my-heart-&-hope-to-croak do I promise to be a more regular reader. For reals.
Hang in there sweetie.
xoxo
Loralee
Sunday, 22 November, 2009 at 13:32I hate moving with the power of a thousand burning suns.
Kat
Sunday, 22 November, 2009 at 21:09OMG. I drove up and down the streets at the Kirtsy book event, looking for a place to park. I was so excited to be going to a party where I didn’t know anyone, and I didn’t go because there was literally. nowhere. to park.
So you must live pretty close to me if you went to that. Welcome, hope you like it here, sorry moving is so hard and that you had to leave so many people you love behind.