Techstalk | Whiskey in My Sippy Cup : Surviving Parenting. Kinda.

When I started blogging, we didn’t have anything at all like we have today. Seriously. Widgets were just methed out short people. Mobile browers were assholes who walked past your store and never bought shit. All we had was a bunch of html, time, and each other.

And we helped each other. Zomyboy taught me how to do this and this to words, because god knows there wasn’t a button for it. I spent months googling for instructions on how to do this. (Hover over it.) I ruined code, reset it, ruined it again, reset it again, and eventually learned how to basically code all the functionality I wanted into my blog.

And then social media was born, and we taught each other that, too. I think I was the first person who asked Greeblemonkey what Twitter was and didn’t get their neck punched. She and Christine were my first two friends, and they @’d me and dm’d me and basically guided me through the rocky terrain that is social media.

Of course, I went and quit it eventually, but still. I came back, and as of last week, Greeblemonkey is still teaching me how to use that fucking website.

My point is that we all used to help each other. You found a new blog tool? You told all your friends how to use it. You saw someone who needed to knowhow to do something? You showed them how to do it.

It seems like now there’s more of a feeling of entitlement about the whole thing. Like, I’m not going to share my tricks with you because I paid for/earned/slaved over a hot html code for them. Meanwhile, I have friends that don’t know how to do anything at all in the back-end of their blog, and don’t even realize that they could know all of this, easily. We don’t talk about how we blog, technically how we do it, anymore, and we’re the ones supposedly revolutionizing the medium. I actually once heard a blogger say that if you didn’t subscribe to ProBlogger, you weren’t a real blogger and had no business here.

Huh?

Maybe I don’t have the attention span to read ProBlogger. It really takes a certain breed. But maybe you do, and he’s sharing all of that knowledge for free, and you’re drinking the kool-aid, so why the fuck are you judging me and not just paying it forward?

*ahem*

So, I’m going to try a little something out. I really don’t know a lot, but I know a little, and I’m going to share it. You got a tech-question about blogging? Hit me. There’s no stupid question except the one you don’t ask. Or, where are your keys? They’re under the 2nd couch cushion, just like they always are. Every Friday, we’re going to get our elbows greasy answering your questions and learn something about the machine behind the machine.

Lesson one: Always hover over links and images. You never know what you’ll miss. {This lesson brought to you by the letters X, K, C and D, who inspired me to learn how to use sub-text}

Lesson two, for tomorrow: Which blogging platform is the right one. Like, for you.

Erica M

Thursday, 28 January, 2010 at 10:11

I love this post, and I’m sure I’ll love the rest of the lessons. I’ve been feeling my way around the code for a few months. I really do wish these tools had been available back in the Golden Age of Blogging (2006, heh), but maybe without FB and Twitter, the third-party app would still be for professional hackers only. Thanks for the sub-text hover…trying it out now.

Marla

Thursday, 28 January, 2010 at 10:24

Ohhh, what is this sub-text you speak of? And I’ve been inquisitive of the blog buttons for some time now… Maybe someone will teach me!

What time is tmr’s lesson?

Miss Britt

Thursday, 28 January, 2010 at 10:28

It’s so easy to forget we all were babies once.

hubs

Thursday, 28 January, 2010 at 10:39

I’m going to go ahead and ask a technical question in your comments so everyine can see the answer.

You reply to comments alot via email. Are you doing that through the wordpress dashboard? If so, are you using a plugin to do it?

Also, the “Notify me of follow-up comments via e-mail” thing below the comments box is always checked but I never get notified of comments unless they are directly from you. How does this work?

Mr Lady
Thursday, 28 January, 2010 at 10:45

@hubs, I do it through email. I CAN do it through my dashboard, but it’s way too confusing and convoluted, mostly because then I have to sift through them all. In my mac email client, all the comments go to one folder, which I can open and reply from or hit Clear All if I get, say, completely unexpectedly get 305 comments on a post and my brain weeps. Also, if I do it through email, I can do it on my phone, provided you know my super secret real life identity. Which YOU do. Not so if I do it through my dashboard.

I don’t think that check mark works because of a different plugin I have set up that is, I think, overriding it. I’ll look into that. Why you get a notification now, like, for THIS comment, is I’m replying directly to you, not just adding another comment down below.
- hubs
  Friday, 29 January, 2010 at 0:11
  
  @Mr Lady, Cool, thanks. Sorry if I created monster by asking questions in the comments.

Debb

Thursday, 28 January, 2010 at 10:54

I am so excited you are going to be doing this. I am way new to the blog world. And I have a hard time even making italics. :)

Also, I just read about the nuts. ROFLMAO.

You rock, Mr. Lady. Can I come to Texas for lessons?

Mr Lady
Thursday, 28 January, 2010 at 11:02

@Debb, Yes, you may. Italics should just have an i butting in your dashboard. If not, write < (then write) em (and close it with)> (then put your) i (and rinse and repeat, just use a / before the next em to say, I’m ending the italics here) .

J from Ireland

Thursday, 28 January, 2010 at 12:04

Well I am delighted to read this post and I look forward to learning from it. I have a blog that I don’t really know what to do with, so I post fuck all.
I would really like to know how to cross out words if you can explain it simply because I am useless on the computer, I will be so grateful.
Thank you for doing this!!

Mr Lady
Thursday, 28 January, 2010 at 12:56

@J from Ireland, it’s so easy. SO easy. go to HTML view in your post, or if you’re doing it in a comment, just type it in around the word you want to ~~strike out.~~ It being this:

To strike out “strike out”, you have to start the html with a < . Then tell it the command (strike for cross out, em for italics, etc) then close the >. Type the word/words you want crossed out (strike out, in this example) and then end the html with < and then / (that says "I want this function to stop here) and then tell it what function again (strike) and then close it all with another >.

So…. < strike > strike out < / strike > Just take out the spaces.

Trixie

Thursday, 28 January, 2010 at 12:23

Oh mighty Mr. Lady, I need your guidance!

I spent some time updating and prettying up my blog about 10 months ago and I STILL don’t know how to make the links at the top work! I was teaching myself all the code after stealing borrowing a lovely existing background but can’t change the top row of links!

It maka me crazy!

Mr Lady
Thursday, 28 January, 2010 at 13:00

@Trixie, it depends on whether those links are a “nav bar” or built into your template. Either way, somewhere in your html, you haven’t told them where to go. How did you get them where they are? It that a template you designed or one you’re using?

I can tell you how to fix it easily enough, I just need to know where to point you. Do you have widgets tied into all three of those links?

Did I totally just confuse you?

Matt

Thursday, 28 January, 2010 at 12:33

Cool.

I’m breaking the rules and commenting too. Here you go, assuming I don’t have to limit my questions to a specific platform, like Wordpress.

How do you host an animated, rotating GIF in Blogger? I have a friend who wants to run an ad…say three frames with a five second pause in between. I can create the animated GIF myself, and run it in Wordpress, but have no idea how to get it to animate on her blog.

Tough on. But you never know. :)

Mr Lady
Thursday, 28 January, 2010 at 13:02

@Matt, In blogger, you should just have to create (or assign) a new HTML widget to the sidebar. Then, cut and paste the html for your gif there. You’ll probably need to upload it to a service that will host it for you, like photobucket.

Momma Chaos

Thursday, 28 January, 2010 at 12:35

Have I told you lately how much I love you ? I have no immediate questions because my brain tends to flutter away if I”m not completely focused but I’ll read everyone else’s and learn for now.. I’m sure I WILL be emailing you a question soon enough :) Thanks!

Coach J

Thursday, 28 January, 2010 at 13:09

I’m so excited. Thanks for doing the dirty work. I usually like dirty work (I like getting dirty), but every now and then, it’s fun to just hang on and enjoy the ride. This innuendo is going way too far…

Burgh Baby

Thursday, 28 January, 2010 at 13:28

About two years ago I wrote and posted some little tips. Stuff like how to bastardize those fugly blogger templates and make them look kinda sorta purdy. I got HATE EMAIL over it. Seriously, hate email. Apparently the mommy bloggers are supposed to leave that sort of talk to The Big Boys. It was so ridiculous and stupid and looking back, I regret that I stopped. So much stuff is easy to do, if someone will just take a second to teach you. So, thank you for doing this. You rock, and stuff.

rachel

Thursday, 28 January, 2010 at 14:20

You know you’re my hero ;-) You’ve helped me SO many times ;-) Talked me down and stuff ;-)

I <3 you.

Lindsy

Thursday, 28 January, 2010 at 14:28

I talked about you, so I figured you should know about it:

http://www.theslcblog.com/2010/01/facelift.html

Thanks again!

MK

Thursday, 28 January, 2010 at 15:36

This is so fam dabulous, I’m excited to read more. Since, you know, I STILL can’t get that damn blogroll to show up on my side bar. But you, fine Mr. Lady, offered to help and that was of the awesome.

MamaBug

Thursday, 28 January, 2010 at 16:30

oooh, I am so impressed by the “hover-over-hyperlink” magic. Am I too stupid asking how it’s done? Half of what all y’all wrote was waaaay over my head.

madge

Thursday, 28 January, 2010 at 16:38

Now I have to go back and troll for all the awesome subtext I’ve been missing. #twohoursGONE

KathH-R

Thursday, 28 January, 2010 at 19:56

I’m thrilled — I’m not that new a blogger, but it doesn’t seem to matter since I never know what I’m doing, and half the time, once I understand it, I immediately forget it. Now I will have something to refer to. Thank you!

MommyTime

Thursday, 28 January, 2010 at 19:58

Okay, so I’m not a total neophyte at this, and I can do the basic html stuff and know how to insert extra bits of code into my template to make cool things happen. But I CANNOT for the life of me find reliable directions for putting CommentLuv on a Blogger blog. Either the links to directions send me to 404 errors, or the directions don’t actually work (and yes, I can follow the directions). If you can explain that, you are the BIGGEST GODDESS ON THE PLANET and will get more traffic than Ashton Kutcher’s Twitter stream. No shit.

Dawn

Thursday, 28 January, 2010 at 20:31

What do you mean by hover? Is it different thatn ‘real world” hover?? Why do I need to and what will I miss if I don’t?

I’m lost already!

hubs
Friday, 29 January, 2010 at 0:07

@Dawn, hover mean put your cursor (arrow pointer) over the top of a hyperlink (link to another site) without clicking your mouse.

Melanie @ Mel, A Dramatic Mommy

Thursday, 28 January, 2010 at 23:32

Share and share alike! Rock on, Mr. Lady. I’m hoping the lovely folks from Blogger will start listening to complaints. I’m about to jump ship because I don’t have the functionality I need. I do not want to insert the ‘Tweet This’ code into every post. But I can’t put it in my template. So annoying!

mn

Thursday, 28 January, 2010 at 23:35

awesome. bc i flunked coding at university, seriously, i dropped out bc all that programming code was like chinese to me. and with all the chinese i eat, that’s now closer to english to me. but thank you. i want to just learn something new bc i’m thinking of changing careers, learn online editing etc. so any pointers are great.
thank you for offering.
question: how do some websites get these real cool graphics, do they pay someone to design them, do it themselves on a certain site…or copy and paste!!?

Thursday, 28 January, 2010 at 23:36

i was supposed to hit the “hit me” link for a question, my bad. duh.

Maria

Friday, 29 January, 2010 at 1:10

I’ll didn’t even know what html was until I started blogging. Amazing what a little determination can do (Well it’s on that blog…. It must be possible…grit teeth). And like all difficulties in life, it gives us something to write about.

Veronica

Friday, 29 January, 2010 at 2:54

Uh yeah, so it’s not just me noticing that our community, seems a helluva lot less community like lately. People are even linking less, or not at all. What happened to sharing the readers? It’s not like by linking someone, all your readers are going to desert you!

It’s been annoying me.

I don’t think I need any questions answered, but thankyou anyway. I’ll come bother you if I think of anything.

Alicia

Friday, 29 January, 2010 at 8:24

I totally agree with this post. Without all of the do gooders out there, and all the help with blogs…I wouldn’t have any clue how to use one. I just started mine up a few weeks ago, and I am slowly learning everything from scratch. I am looking forward to reading the rest of your posts!

Alicia
Coffee Mugs and Sippy Cups

Aimee Greeblemonkey

Friday, 29 January, 2010 at 8:30

You aren’t going to pay me??

Tracey

Friday, 29 January, 2010 at 9:14

Okey dokey. What’s Problogger? Yes, I could have clicked on your link but the coffee hasn’t kicked in yet. Also, I have lots of things I know CAN be done to my blog, but the effort makes me recoil and hide under my desk.

Mr Lady
Friday, 29 January, 2010 at 9:17

@Tracey, Problogger is a guy. He’s, like, the world’s leading authority on all things blog. Every little trick and tool you’d ever need is on his site. He IS the users manual for the blogosphere.

Gimme one thing you want done, and lets see if we can’t do it. :)

Martin

Friday, 29 January, 2010 at 11:21

All I want to know is, how do I turn the bugger off?

Mr Lady
Friday, 29 January, 2010 at 11:24

@Martin, ask it if it hurt when it fell from heaven?

Laura

Friday, 29 January, 2010 at 13:05

This is fantastic!
I’ve been reading your blog (and several others) for….a long time, but have just ventured into my own blog recently. I can tell I’ve got a lot to learn and I’m looking forward to seeing what I will get out of your tutorials!
Thanks a million!