my poor poor heart

Ok. Now I'm freaked out. I have a congenital heart defect. I have always known this. I couldn't take P.E. as a kid and I have to take antibiotics for 2 weeks before I go to the dentist. I have always known the symptoms-2 holes, blood leaking between the chambers-but I have never known the name of the problem; they told me once but it was a really long word and I was 10 or so. Anyway, my midwife has been fairly curious about what's wrong, so I called my dad tonight. We got on to the American Heart Association's website and when he saw the name, he remembered it. I did to. It's called Atrioventricular (A'tre-o-ven-TRIK'u-ler) canal defect. It is super serious. It requires surgery in infancy or in the early teens to fix. I, of course, have never had an open heart surgery, and so I asked my dad why the hell this never got fixed. Evidently my mother didn't want to do the surgery. Evidently, she decided to see if I lived until 14, at which time the doctors said I would be in the clear.

I am in the clear. The problem is that I have a severe form of this, called insufficiency, where the blood leaks back and forth between the chambers of my heart on both sides. I have gone 30 years without being able properly explain this to a doctor, or even knowing the severity of my defect. I thought I had a totally normal little defect. Not this horrible thing. Someone should have made sure I knew. I am thoroughly annoyed.