Thursday
Dec132007
Bah. With a little Humbug.
Thursday, December 13, 2007 at 3:53PM | Mr Lady
Christmas has been slow to come to me. Don't get me wrong, I really like Christmas. Any excuse to lie to my kids makes my cold, dead heart sing. But there's just some things I don't get yet.
I get the whole 'buy everyone a bunch of crap they don't need' part of Christmas. I like having the tree, and the pretty gifts under the tree. I like baking the cookies and eating the ham. I love wrapping presents. The look on my kids' faces on Christmas morning makes every single other thing in life totally worth it.
Will someone please explain the stockings to me already? What exactly is the deal with them? I have just spent 2 weeks, and the mortgage, searching for presents for 4 people who have every stinking thing they could want already, and I DID IT. I got great presents. I was feeling all full of myself, and then I looked at the mantle.
OH SHIT.
I have to fill those up, too?
My husband likes to fill them with candy. This from a man who hates that I give the kids dessert. This from the man who will have to pay the orthodonture bill. I'm guessing his mom filled his with candy. I love candy, but I have no inclination whatsoever to relive the horror we just finished called "Huge Bags of Candy Laying Around", aka "Halloween Aftermath". And I bought them everything I wanted to already.
WHAT AM I GOING TO PUT IN THESE STOCKINGS?
Maybe it's my cheapness talking, but if I'm spending more than $5 bucks on it, it's going under the tree. More than $5 should count towards the bulk. Anything less than $5 is going to break in less than 5 minutes.
Stockings stress me out. I got them Hot Wheels, candy, stickers, candy, toothbrushes, candy, stuffed elves and reindeer, candy and pencils. I think that's going to do it. But there is still one problem....I have a 35 year old man who thinks his stocking should have stuff in it, too.
When the boys were little, I used to put a pack of Marlboros and a fancy lighter in his. They boys would frown on that, now. I gave him a lovely, small, grooming kit in his stocking two years ago, so there goes that idea. He already owns 2 watches worth more than the toddler, so that's out, too. He doesn't wear ties, ever, and if I put tube socks and Vasoline in there, then I have no right to bitch about his middle of the night "Email Checks", now do I? I got him really, uber, fancy golfs balls for under the tree, the kind I won't let him spend the money on normally, and now I am flat out of ideas.
Grrrrrr.
It shouldn't be this hard. Whoever came up with the stocking idea, I loathe you. You, sir, are on my short list. Pray you don't bump into me in a dark alley.
I get the whole 'buy everyone a bunch of crap they don't need' part of Christmas. I like having the tree, and the pretty gifts under the tree. I like baking the cookies and eating the ham. I love wrapping presents. The look on my kids' faces on Christmas morning makes every single other thing in life totally worth it.
Will someone please explain the stockings to me already? What exactly is the deal with them? I have just spent 2 weeks, and the mortgage, searching for presents for 4 people who have every stinking thing they could want already, and I DID IT. I got great presents. I was feeling all full of myself, and then I looked at the mantle.
OH SHIT.
I have to fill those up, too?
My husband likes to fill them with candy. This from a man who hates that I give the kids dessert. This from the man who will have to pay the orthodonture bill. I'm guessing his mom filled his with candy. I love candy, but I have no inclination whatsoever to relive the horror we just finished called "Huge Bags of Candy Laying Around", aka "Halloween Aftermath". And I bought them everything I wanted to already.
WHAT AM I GOING TO PUT IN THESE STOCKINGS?
Maybe it's my cheapness talking, but if I'm spending more than $5 bucks on it, it's going under the tree. More than $5 should count towards the bulk. Anything less than $5 is going to break in less than 5 minutes.
Stockings stress me out. I got them Hot Wheels, candy, stickers, candy, toothbrushes, candy, stuffed elves and reindeer, candy and pencils. I think that's going to do it. But there is still one problem....I have a 35 year old man who thinks his stocking should have stuff in it, too.
When the boys were little, I used to put a pack of Marlboros and a fancy lighter in his. They boys would frown on that, now. I gave him a lovely, small, grooming kit in his stocking two years ago, so there goes that idea. He already owns 2 watches worth more than the toddler, so that's out, too. He doesn't wear ties, ever, and if I put tube socks and Vasoline in there, then I have no right to bitch about his middle of the night "Email Checks", now do I? I got him really, uber, fancy golfs balls for under the tree, the kind I won't let him spend the money on normally, and now I am flat out of ideas.
Grrrrrr.
It shouldn't be this hard. Whoever came up with the stocking idea, I loathe you. You, sir, are on my short list. Pray you don't bump into me in a dark alley.
Reader Comments (15)
I haven't even started shopping. I'm terrified. I don't have any ideas.
Stockings. Potential to be fun. Probably easier when the kids can contribute (now we all have to get something for each other, staying under the $5 limit). As kids, we always got an apple, an orange, nuts, a little bit of candy, and then a couple of little holiday-related toys. That was just fine with me.
For the husband? No clue. I just agreed to help my soon-to-be-ex-again's mother come up with ideas for him. I don't even have ideas for him. And I'm probably going to break up with him soon, if I can generate the courage to do so. Merry Christmas.
Meh. I totally forgot about that. But I also just bought my first gift this morning and already decided we're going away next year, so...
You know, the "money" gift in a stocking would be a little booklet of "all access, anytime, anywhere" coupons. Combined that with a few mini-liquor bottles and a pack of cigarellos and any guy would be more than happy. At least mine would. I could probably forgo the big present that way...
Otherwise, I saw I few silly little things in Old Navy today for his and hers stockings.
It's odd, we never had stockings. Always presents under the tree, but never a stocking. Was I ripped off?
Anyways, it means that I don't feel the need to do stockings for the short people. YAY! As for tree gifts, Amy is only getting books this year. Thank goodness she is still pretty little.
You're not going to like this idea, but my dad thinks it's REAL clever to go down in the basement and pull out old crap that we haven't seen in years and put it in our stockings. Sometimes he even wraps it.
I have absolutely no idea what to put in your husband's stocking but just wanted to say Thanks. I now know what to put in my husbands. I'm going to go with the tube socks and vaseline because frankly, this chick needs a break. I keep telling him the sign reads "Closed for the holidays," but clearly he must be illiterate.
I always have a tough time with stockings. Usually candy and a toothbrush - makes sense right? Luckily the stockings are just for kids. I can't even find one single thing to buy for my husband, let alone come up with stocking stuffers! Holy cow!
LOL... he "expects" a stocking. How funny. Fill it up with lots of candy. Heehee.
Can you please move to Atlanta already?
That being said....
Tim Horton's. You have those, eh? Timmy Ho's coupons. The coupons that he can use instead of going on "Email Checks". Oh, and then, you gotta get a rubber chicken.. Ok, I'm reachin' here.
Ferrero Rochers are a big hit with my big guy. ;) Just sayin'.
Atlanta, Georgia BAYBEE!!!
Books. They would all appreciate a book. Josh would appreciate a book, right?
Candy canes are a must, even though they'll end up at the bottom of the stocking all stuck inside the lining, but you've gotta have them. It's so christmassy.
I also just thought of hot chocolate packets, because that would please my little dude. I love the toothbrush idea, I will have to do that.
Girls are much easier to stocking stuff for. That's what lip smackers were made for. Oh my god, I have to get my sister new lip smackers. I am now officially NOT done shopping.
call me impersonal but I'm all about the giftcard!
I usually have to run around at the last minute as I tend to forget about buying for the stockings. It doesn't help that I scorched the stockings when we installed the gas fireplace.
I don't do stockings. I mean really, the 100's of dollars under the tree isn't enough...
However I do hang them for decoration.
I always recommend a stocking full of porn.
I have a chocolate santa for my husband. nothing else. I suck.
Hubby got hunting gloves, a thumb drive, a new flashlight, some chocolates. Some "personal" coupons might be good too...you know, "1 trash taken out without griping", "1 take your car for the oil change", that sort of thing ;)You get get romantic with it you're into that sort of thing. I usually just put stuff in stockings that is smaller than a tennis ball & doesn't come in a box.