Wednesday
Dec312008
A Post For Revenge?
Wednesday, December 31, 2008 at 1:21AM | Mr Lady
I'm Chris, the guest blogger of 12/30. I cannot begin to describe the amount of trust the Queen Blogger is displaying by giving me the wheel here. It rather makes me wish I wasn't in the habit of deleting emails...
While I haven't been in Mr Lady's life for long, I do have the pleasure of being in the room while the song "Whiskey In My Sippy Cup" was written and recorded. I also had the pleasure of meeting her son T while doing laundry. He was golfing down the basement hallway and asked me for change for the soda machine. I gave him some quarters and then we golfed.
T is the ulitmate wingman. And T is how I met Mr Lady:
Back when she smoked, she and her children spent ample amounts of time on the apartment stoop (stoops are a wonderful thing, by the way). I could never get past the stoop without interacting with them. One day, T was telling some crazy story about running really fast and then Mr Lady responded with, "Next kid, less crack." I honestly thought she was serious.
Six years and one kid later, I still suspect she was serious although I'm not convinced she held her promise. :)
But anyways, since this blog is about...parenting...and whatnot I feel I should say something about what I've learned about it from Mr Lady. But understand that I'm only a parent to a dog, Lucie, and she's more of a roommate than anything.
Mr Lady's kids are awesome. I love them. I have their pictures in my wallet, and I helped them win a Pinewood Derby and a Raingutter Regata and taught them how to play Grand Theft Auto. From them I have relearned how to imagine.
When I met them they lived in a 900 sq. ft. two-bedroom basement apartment with security bars on all the windows. It was very cramped for four people and very depressing. Their playground was the sidewalk -- I often heard people in the building talk about how sad it was they had no place to play. They attended school in the worst district in the state. You wouldn't think a scenario like this would yield three kids that are kind, respectful, incredibly smart, and academically focused.
But what they do have is a father that puts tremendous effort towards providing for them, and a mother who anchors the household as firmly as any I have known. The house is always clean (or being cleaned), a home-cooked meal is always prepared, and there is always a schedule. They have a set bed time and a prescribed time carved out for TV and video games -- after homework.
When I compare Mr Lady's household with others, single-parent or not, and privileged or struggling, what I see is that the homes with schedules and good meals always have children that are a pleasure to have as friends. The homes with no structure always have children that are nothing but birth control for guys like me.
Now that I'm an uncle, I am enjoying the opportunity to confirm my theory about schedules. Whenever my sister and brother-in-law stray from the schedule, I hear reports about the rough days that followed. I also get to see how challenging it is to keep a schedule and that it takes more effort than probably anything else in Life.
So if I'm ever lucky enough to talk a girl into going on a date with me, and then charming enough to get her to alope to Las Vegas for a Buddy Holly wedding, I'm going to make sure at least one of us is an anchor for the family. We'll have bedtimes and a daily schedule that trumps anything, including colds, vacations, movies, puzzles, visitors, and Sunday dinner with the grandparents.
And maybe somebody will enjoy having my kids as friends, just like I enjoy B L and T.
While I haven't been in Mr Lady's life for long, I do have the pleasure of being in the room while the song "Whiskey In My Sippy Cup" was written and recorded. I also had the pleasure of meeting her son T while doing laundry. He was golfing down the basement hallway and asked me for change for the soda machine. I gave him some quarters and then we golfed.
T is the ulitmate wingman. And T is how I met Mr Lady:
Back when she smoked, she and her children spent ample amounts of time on the apartment stoop (stoops are a wonderful thing, by the way). I could never get past the stoop without interacting with them. One day, T was telling some crazy story about running really fast and then Mr Lady responded with, "Next kid, less crack." I honestly thought she was serious.
Six years and one kid later, I still suspect she was serious although I'm not convinced she held her promise. :)
But anyways, since this blog is about...parenting...and whatnot I feel I should say something about what I've learned about it from Mr Lady. But understand that I'm only a parent to a dog, Lucie, and she's more of a roommate than anything.
Mr Lady's kids are awesome. I love them. I have their pictures in my wallet, and I helped them win a Pinewood Derby and a Raingutter Regata and taught them how to play Grand Theft Auto. From them I have relearned how to imagine.
When I met them they lived in a 900 sq. ft. two-bedroom basement apartment with security bars on all the windows. It was very cramped for four people and very depressing. Their playground was the sidewalk -- I often heard people in the building talk about how sad it was they had no place to play. They attended school in the worst district in the state. You wouldn't think a scenario like this would yield three kids that are kind, respectful, incredibly smart, and academically focused.
But what they do have is a father that puts tremendous effort towards providing for them, and a mother who anchors the household as firmly as any I have known. The house is always clean (or being cleaned), a home-cooked meal is always prepared, and there is always a schedule. They have a set bed time and a prescribed time carved out for TV and video games -- after homework.
When I compare Mr Lady's household with others, single-parent or not, and privileged or struggling, what I see is that the homes with schedules and good meals always have children that are a pleasure to have as friends. The homes with no structure always have children that are nothing but birth control for guys like me.
Now that I'm an uncle, I am enjoying the opportunity to confirm my theory about schedules. Whenever my sister and brother-in-law stray from the schedule, I hear reports about the rough days that followed. I also get to see how challenging it is to keep a schedule and that it takes more effort than probably anything else in Life.
So if I'm ever lucky enough to talk a girl into going on a date with me, and then charming enough to get her to alope to Las Vegas for a Buddy Holly wedding, I'm going to make sure at least one of us is an anchor for the family. We'll have bedtimes and a daily schedule that trumps anything, including colds, vacations, movies, puzzles, visitors, and Sunday dinner with the grandparents.
And maybe somebody will enjoy having my kids as friends, just like I enjoy B L and T.
Reader Comments (13)
Haha Next Kid, Less Crack? If you showed me a million quotes and asked me to pick the one she uttered, that would certainly be the one I'd pick. I have heard a lot about you. Nice to hear something from you. I'm on deck for a post. I think I need more crack to write something worthy of being the last post of 2008.
BusyDad wrote..http://www.busydadblog.com/entries/sending-you-out-confused.html" rel="nofollow">Sending You Out Confused
nice post, funny.
Chris, I love your post! It's so true to life and just awesome.
Awe..that's so sweet.
~K
Schedules rock. I highly suggest having preemies like I did. By the time they let them out of intensive care, the nurses already have them trained.
You have single-handedly just wrecked the rep that Mr. Lady has worked so herd to acquire.
Great job!
WeaselMomma wrote..http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/WorldOfWeasels/~3/495894135/moving.html" rel="nofollow">Moving
Wow, a Buddy Holly wedding. Now I want to hear more about one of those. I grew up without much, too, but you're right. As long as the support is there, you just kind of grow up complicated, which sucks, but it beats growing up to be a criminal.
**-2008 End of Year Blog Marathon- You are my 38th stop in an 8 hour posting extravaganza! A link to your site will be posted at Stomped Monster!** Follow my marathon live at Twitter: DIY_Rain
Rain wrote..http://rain-blanken.blogspot.com/2008/12/blog-comment-marathon-2008.html" rel="nofollow">Blog Comment Marathon 2008
is a raingutter regatta kinda like racing leaves along the gutters, or am i waaay off track?? lol cool post and you sound like a cool neighbor to have.
good luck finding a woman who wants a buddy holly wedding (although i LOVE buddy holly, sadly (for you that is) i'm taken)
nonna wrote..http://nonnasnonsense.blogspot.com/2008/12/too-short-tuesday.html" rel="nofollow">too short tuesday
Yeah, "Next kid, less crack" a truly a Mr Lady gem. I hope I never forget it, or how uncomfortable I felt after she said it!
Thanks to everyone for the nice comments.
Chris wrote..http://chriskchew.wordpress.com/2008/11/11/developing-net-on-a-mac-%E2%80%93-performance-and-productivity/" rel="nofollow">Developing .NET On A Mac – Performance and Productivity
The Raingutter Regatta is a Boyscouts event where kids blow a sailboat down a length of gutter filled with water. It's genius.
http://images.google.com/images?q=raingutter%20regata
Chris wrote..http://chriskchew.wordpress.com/2008/11/11/developing-net-on-a-mac-%E2%80%93-performance-and-productivity/" rel="nofollow">Developing .NET On A Mac – Performance and Productivity
I totally agree with the schedule theory.....My peanut is a monster when we side track from it. Plus you can tell the difference between her and her unstructured cousins...great post.
super mama wrote..http://naturelovinsupermama.blogspot.com/2008/12/new-years-resolutions-3-of-4.html" rel="nofollow">New Years Resolutions 3 of 4
YOU SAID SOMETHING NICE ABOUT ME. I knew it would happen eventually. :)
"The house is always clean (or being cleaned), a home-cooked meal is always prepared ... "
*snort* Dude she has pulled the wool so far down over your eyes... :P
Marge wrote..http://wheremytruthlives.wordpress.com/2008/12/30/yak/" rel="nofollow">YAK