Sunday
Jan102010
Peter Pan
Sunday, January 10, 2010 at 10:46PM | Mr Lady
When my boys were little, I could get them to do just about anything, so long as it meant they'd get to grow up because of it. "Momma, why do I have to take a baff?" So your skin can be clean and stretchy for it to grow, of course. "Momma, do I have to eat dis broccowee?" Only if you want your muscles to be strong so you can grow up big and tall, silly boy. "Momma, I don't want to sweep!" Well, if you don't sleep, your body can't grow. Little boys can only grow while they sleep. You want to grow, right? All they wanted to do was grow-grow-grow. They wanted to be big like their daddy, like each other. They wanted to do big boy things like play video games and go to school and ride bikes outside.
Not so much with my daughter.
I so much as mention growing up and the waterworks begin. "I don't want to gwow up, Momma! I want to stay wittowl forever!" she cries. And it's not just pissy little defiant four year old tears, either. The kid is flat out afraid of growing up. I have no idea where this comes from.
I've tried to rationalize this with her. I've pointed out that she's already a big girl; she pees on the potty and she rides a bike and puts on her own shoes and eats ice cream cones. Babies don't do those things. She drinks milk from a cup, not boobies. She has a big girl bed, not a crib. She writes her name and plays on the computer. She's already big, I tell her, and she just cries and cries and tells me no, she won't grow up. She's going to stay wittowl. She can't grow up.
Now I know where Peter Pan came from.
I've kind of given up on the whole thing and just accepted that I'm going to have to resort to "Show momma how the piggies eat" to get her to eat her vegetables, or worse, the "Pull it out of her belly-button" game which is really fun when they eat mini-marshmallows but not at all fun when they eat mashed potatoes. The fact of the matter is that this is the last kid I get, and I wouldn't mind it in the least if she stayed little. She got big way too fast as it is, really.
Except that she really wants to go to school. Except that I really want her to go to school. Except that my husband would like to see his floor and my boss would like to see that report and I need her to be elsewhere if I'm going to get those things done.
Last time we tried school, she was two and not at all ready and cried from drop off to pick up every time we left her there. We ended up pulling her out because I just didn't feel like paying someone to make my kid cry. We haven't tried since, but Tuesday is supposed to be her first day at pre-school here. And she's very excited. She asks me all the time what she'll be doing and brags that she's going to have a teacher and homework, just like the guys. She tells me that she won't cry at school this time, which, holy memory Batman, and I say to her that of course she won't, because she's a big girl now, and I hold my breath.
And she looks at me with those big, green eyes that are starting to well up with tears, and she thinks. She thinks really hard and says, "No momma, I'm a big BOY now. I'm your son. Big son-boys go to school." And I think I have a really clever little girl.
Not so much with my daughter.
I so much as mention growing up and the waterworks begin. "I don't want to gwow up, Momma! I want to stay wittowl forever!" she cries. And it's not just pissy little defiant four year old tears, either. The kid is flat out afraid of growing up. I have no idea where this comes from.
I've tried to rationalize this with her. I've pointed out that she's already a big girl; she pees on the potty and she rides a bike and puts on her own shoes and eats ice cream cones. Babies don't do those things. She drinks milk from a cup, not boobies. She has a big girl bed, not a crib. She writes her name and plays on the computer. She's already big, I tell her, and she just cries and cries and tells me no, she won't grow up. She's going to stay wittowl. She can't grow up.
Now I know where Peter Pan came from.
I've kind of given up on the whole thing and just accepted that I'm going to have to resort to "Show momma how the piggies eat" to get her to eat her vegetables, or worse, the "Pull it out of her belly-button" game which is really fun when they eat mini-marshmallows but not at all fun when they eat mashed potatoes. The fact of the matter is that this is the last kid I get, and I wouldn't mind it in the least if she stayed little. She got big way too fast as it is, really.
Except that she really wants to go to school. Except that I really want her to go to school. Except that my husband would like to see his floor and my boss would like to see that report and I need her to be elsewhere if I'm going to get those things done.
Last time we tried school, she was two and not at all ready and cried from drop off to pick up every time we left her there. We ended up pulling her out because I just didn't feel like paying someone to make my kid cry. We haven't tried since, but Tuesday is supposed to be her first day at pre-school here. And she's very excited. She asks me all the time what she'll be doing and brags that she's going to have a teacher and homework, just like the guys. She tells me that she won't cry at school this time, which, holy memory Batman, and I say to her that of course she won't, because she's a big girl now, and I hold my breath.
And she looks at me with those big, green eyes that are starting to well up with tears, and she thinks. She thinks really hard and says, "No momma, I'm a big BOY now. I'm your son. Big son-boys go to school." And I think I have a really clever little girl.
Reader Comments (20)
Those work calls just won't be the same without a "stop grabbing my boobie!" or "don't stick that up your nose" every few minutes. Some things are worth trading productivity for :)
Oh my. School. We started our November baby in Kindergarten at age 4. I didn't cry because he was. But. On the first day of first grade? Buckets. She's Mr. Lady's offspring. She'll do just fine.
: Peter Pan http://www.whiskeyinmysippycup.com/2010/01/10/peter-pan/
My 8 year old doesn't want to grow up. She's scared of learning to drive. She doesn't want to leave home, and when she does - she plans to live with her little sister. In fact, she's planning to still live with her when she's an old lady, and they are planning to die together.
As if that doesn't freak me out enough.
My 5 (nearly 6) year old just wants to grow old enough to overtake her big sister, or at least equal her, but when she was 4 she used to say that she was still a baby, and talk in babytalk all the time.
She is adorable and brilliant and I can't wait to meet her! :-)
SO sweet!
Awe. The kids can really melt your heart sometimes. Brought my kiddo to work one day last week. I was amazed all day at how polite and mature and TALL he is. He's almost 11. Where did my widdle boy go?
Oh, I love that rationale. Isn't that just the most awesome thing about little kids? I don't want to be a big girl but I guess I could be a big boy.
My daughter's dad married and I married another and we both had 2 kids, seperatly. But around the same time frame. When my older son was 3 (so he was the only son), he rationalized that since his Jack was his sister's brother (via the other marriage) and HE was his sister's brother, then that meant he and Jack were brothers. And nothing could talk him out of that math.
Mine has begun to call herself a big boy to get out of potty training - as if boys don't piss in a toilet.
Hope that all goes well tomorrow!
I think my three-year-old goes for the growing up argument mainly because she thinks she'll get to go work with Daddy when she's a grown-up. Also, her biggest crush (can't believe it, but yes, she has one) is in kindergarten and she wants to grow up so she can go to kindergarten with Elliott.
Maybe your little one just needs to see some of the good things about being a grown up, like...um...hmm.
We just got our little one in pre-school starting next fall. I hate her getting older too. That means I am getting older and stuff ain't working like it used to.
Your girl is a piece of work and will some day rule this world.
She's precious, I can understand the Peter Pan thing. I hope she does well in school!
So, Peter Pan problem huh? I would tell her, as I have told mine, that though must get bigger, you do NOT have to grow up. You can continue being a kid all you want. And, to be completely honest, I would be more then a little upset if they ever lost their imagination as I have never lost mine. And then I tell them about a fantastic adventure I had with dinosaurs. I know you will do right chica and best of luck on the 1st day of school. I was a mess on my 1st sons 1st day of school and I don't even get to live with him.
She will be fine. She really well. There is such a huge, amazing difference when our children are ready to do something that they were so unready for before. She will shine and it will be wonderful and sad all at once. Because she is ready. Good luck!
Awesomeness. My daughter thinks she can grow up to be a boy if she wants to. Or an elephant. Anything really, since that's what I told her once. 3of3 will be great!
We had a fair bit of that at our house. The shades of refusal change a bit by the time they are 16 when 'grow up' means get up out of bed and to school while you cannot wait until they are out of the house. I think its a natural course for parents and teens to want to separate. Still, we cried mightily driving away from college.
sounds reasonable to me ....
Christ that's cute.
(Of course, in a, "Oh my GOD you let her think that only boys need to go to school?!? What the hell is wrong with you? Are you trying to raise a golddigger or trophy wife?" sort of way.)
Clever indeed!
x,
adhocmom
Well if you get a teary-eyed and lonely on Tuesday and need a playdate...give me a call ;-)
I love the fact that you quoted A Christmas Story.