;)
Friday
Jan142011
You Show Me Yours...
Friday, January 14, 2011 at 7:06AM
A long time ago, in a galaxy far, far away....
I tried to figure out how long we've been doing this thing, and I *think* it's in it's 5th year? Not sure. Ask Rude Cactus if you really have to know...it's all his fault, anyways.
Last year, I was all like Delurk! and I'll add you to my blogroll! and then right that very week, my blogroll service shut down. You ever try to re-build a five year old blogroll? Yeah.
So this year, I'm not going to make any grandiose, sweeping gestures that I can't follow through on, but in the interest of getting you to out yourself, I'll out myself a little bit.
You know how they say everything's bigger in Texas? Yeah.
Four years ago, that said a significantly smaller number.
Right after we moved to Texas, I was like Hmm, I really have to do something about my ass. So I thought about what I ate and made better choices and a year later, I'm about 20 pounds heavier than I was. So fuck my life. I bought that 30 Day Shred bullshit and here's the official review:
See, I was that girl in grade school who sat in the bleachers during gym, looking all sullen and pale with huge dark circles under her eyes and lips that were the most subtle shade of blue while you did push ups and sit ups and jumping jacks and ran miles because I have two holes in my heart, but I have the kind of two holes in my heart that, in 1975, led my doctors to say to my parents, "well, you can fix the holes, or you can just wait and see. If she makes it to 14, you should be okay" and I have the kind of two parents who didn't have enough money to gamble, but they sure did have enough kids to.
Don't worry...I totally made it to 14.
But I couldn't take gym class ever. So I'd read or do math or sort books in the library or get the shit beat out of me on the playground because I was the kind of kid who would use her spare time to read or do math or sort books in the library and then one day, that goddamn Presidential Fitness Test would come along and good old Ronny Reagan didn't give to shits what my doctor's note said, I was doing a set of chin-ups, so help him god.
And so, for about a week every year, the gym teacher would make me take gym class so that I could pass that test. And that is that exact sort of pain I feel like right now, except I asked for this.
So anyway, I'm officially a #shredhead and I'm still minding what I eat and I quit smoking for real, I think, and I learned at least seven new swear words in the 20 minutes I worked out with Jillian Michaels so I'm still getting a decent education during PE.
Alright, your turn. Delurk away....
I tried to figure out how long we've been doing this thing, and I *think* it's in it's 5th year? Not sure. Ask Rude Cactus if you really have to know...it's all his fault, anyways.
Last year, I was all like Delurk! and I'll add you to my blogroll! and then right that very week, my blogroll service shut down. You ever try to re-build a five year old blogroll? Yeah.
So this year, I'm not going to make any grandiose, sweeping gestures that I can't follow through on, but in the interest of getting you to out yourself, I'll out myself a little bit.
You know how they say everything's bigger in Texas? Yeah.
Four years ago, that said a significantly smaller number.
Right after we moved to Texas, I was like Hmm, I really have to do something about my ass. So I thought about what I ate and made better choices and a year later, I'm about 20 pounds heavier than I was. So fuck my life. I bought that 30 Day Shred bullshit and here's the official review:
See, I was that girl in grade school who sat in the bleachers during gym, looking all sullen and pale with huge dark circles under her eyes and lips that were the most subtle shade of blue while you did push ups and sit ups and jumping jacks and ran miles because I have two holes in my heart, but I have the kind of two holes in my heart that, in 1975, led my doctors to say to my parents, "well, you can fix the holes, or you can just wait and see. If she makes it to 14, you should be okay" and I have the kind of two parents who didn't have enough money to gamble, but they sure did have enough kids to.
Don't worry...I totally made it to 14.
But I couldn't take gym class ever. So I'd read or do math or sort books in the library or get the shit beat out of me on the playground because I was the kind of kid who would use her spare time to read or do math or sort books in the library and then one day, that goddamn Presidential Fitness Test would come along and good old Ronny Reagan didn't give to shits what my doctor's note said, I was doing a set of chin-ups, so help him god.
And so, for about a week every year, the gym teacher would make me take gym class so that I could pass that test. And that is that exact sort of pain I feel like right now, except I asked for this.
So anyway, I'm officially a #shredhead and I'm still minding what I eat and I quit smoking for real, I think, and I learned at least seven new swear words in the 20 minutes I worked out with Jillian Michaels so I'm still getting a decent education during PE.
Alright, your turn. Delurk away....
Reader Comments (94)
Congrats! (on becoming a shredhead, silly.)
At least you had an excuse for not being physically active as a kid: I was just a lazy ass.
I am totally NOT a shredhead though my ass could certainly use it. My fear is that I'll actually lose my gut weight and still have the roundness within it which could mean that my ovaries have decided to grow extra tumors again. So I have no desire to do sit ups and lose weight, lest I be confronted with what my stomach may contain.
Fabulous, right?
Is it delurking if you know me already?
Congrats on the shredding. Watch out for those damn pushups though.
Delurking away here :)
I'm too scared to even get on my scale, let alone take a photo of it!
I don't think I'm a lurker so much as someone who just stopped by because you said you were on crack. Actually that's a lie and makes me sound like a concerned benevolent person. I stopped by because you said you had a picture of yourself on your scale and I'm superficial and catty like that. But I'll be back because of your official Shred review. I love me some Helena Bonham Carter.
I bought that Shred DVD crap for myself for xmas and it's still in the wrapper. Christmas '09, that is.
I was born with a heart defect also. But I have had 5 open heart surgeries to fix mine. Have you seen a cardiologist lately?
I live with a woman who does the hard version of the shred... and then does a 4-mile run as a cooldown.
It's horrifying, dude.
Good luck with your weight-loss journey. I've recently been told that my sudden, mysterious knee pain is due to being overweight, and the only way to feel better is to lose weight. I don't exercise, I have slow metabolism due to my thyroid being a slacker, and I'm from south Louisiana, where eating is a hobby. Plus, I'm a picky eater and a full-time student. Somehow, I need to get over all of those things and make there be less of me.
I don't shred, not even my head. I do lurk and delurking sounds kinda kinky, which is fine. I've been using this new weight loss plan, I try to eat less then I burn. So far so good! Maybe someday, I'll get back to 177 :-/
I have the Shred! I actually like it, but I also swear at Ms. Jillian throughout the whole thing. I just can't seem to find the time to actually do it. Yeah, I know it's only 20 minutes. But I am a single mom (have my kids every other week, but still have to take them to all their activities on my week's off) and it's hard to find a spare 20 minutes.
Good luck with the weight loss! It's a constant battle (at least for me). I feel like I am clawing my way down the scale.
Hey there! I am not exactly a lurker. I comment occasionally. But I totally stalk you on Twitter. I mean...er...I totally follow your every word...er...I notice that you tweet! :) But really...I love Jillian Michaels. I have a shot of a scale with a significantly higher number on it than your number but which is a significantly number lower than it was two years ago. And I am working to get to your scale #. And less. And I am fro, Texas so I know that this is true about things being bigger there.
Ok...I am rambling. Sorry. Hello, my name is Charisse. I dropped off the blog planet for a while, but now I am back and blogging on TWO blogs. :)
Bravo for the 30 Day Shred! I'm in reasonably good shape, run a few times a week, and frankly? The Shred and Jillian Michaels scare the crap out of me. So, if you can survive that? YOU ARE AWESOME.
Delurking in Oklahoma, welcome to the south!
I've been sending Jennie my weight for Biggest Blogging Loser, but haven't had the nerve to post it on my blog.
Show-off. ;)You may have just encouraged me to out myself, as enormous as I currently am.
I can't shred. Sucks. It made me cry. I can do other things though, just not the Shred.
I hate my body since I: A) injured my knee and B) quit roller derby. Oh, I can do all the strength stuff. I see my trainer once a week and go hang from stuff at aerial class once a week, but apparently you have to do cardio too. And ohmygod I hate those machines. My newest attempt is the Bollywood workout. That's more fun. And I signed up to do the Warrior Dash in August, so I am going to be forced to run at some point...
More power to you. I own the 30 day shred and never made it past day three. I have to say "kudos" for posting the picture of the scale. I'm right there with you, almost the same numbers.
Well, you KNOW I'm reading ;)
I've been curious about the Shred, but every time I read someone who has done it they are talking about how painful it is. And I don't really like pain, so I'm skipping it (for now). Wii Fit is pretty much the same thing, right? HAHAHA.
You're my idol.
Not only have you quit smoking but now you're losing weight using a system that sounds like an inquisition-era torture device?
I haven't done either of these things, and I don't have the "hole in my heart" excuse, just terminally lazy with two toddlers.
Thinking about it, I guess I was stalking... err..lurking.
I've lurked for a long long time but look, I'm delurking! I'm 25, live in Texas now too (not Houston, I'm up near Austin), and don't have any kids. I'm afraid to hop on the scale at the moment because dude, everything really is bigger in this state. That's going to need to happen though... sigh...
I am the biggest Delurking Day failure that ever did fail. True story. But at least I delurked. A while ago. Ahem.
I took today of of work because I really needed it & then got up at 4:30 am, anyway, to go to the gym & do a one hour workout involving intervals and weights and a crazy, perky lady that I totally love because it's my ONLY chance ALL WEEK and 4:30am is STILL sleeping in. For me.
This might be how you know I'm crazy.
MIGHT.
I was the kid reading the books, doing the math, and hanging out with the librarian, too. But, no way in hell am I doing that shred. Have fun!
I don't know if I've ever delurked with you. I feel like I'm just getting to know you well enough to do that. And like ZoeyJane, my copy of the DVD is wrapped (and dusty) on top of the television. But I'm working on it :)
Hi! Delurking. I read all the time but almost never comment because I'm useless that way. I'm not doing the shred thing but I am learning how to run. I used to run when I was much younger but kept getting patellar tendonitis (tendons should not swell up that much, I'm just saying) and icing my knees was not fun. Now I have these cool shoes with toes and practically no sole, which seems like they would cause more problems, but now I can run and my knees don't hurt.
Oh, and my scale number is higher than yours, but it is coming down, slowly. :)
Delurking from Saskatchewan, where it's too damn cold to do anything right now. Brrrr...
Happy Delurking Day!
I read your blog daily. Not sure if I've ever commented. You make me laugh and cry both on certain days. I quit smoking 3 1/2 years ago and just started on my quest to get rid of 20 or so pounds gained over those years. Decided it is time to get serious. Good luck on your quest. I have the shred too but haven't done it yet. I do Jazzercise a few times a week and really enjoy it! There I delurked! Have a great weekend.
Consider me delurked, but just this one time. Now I need to crawl back in my cave to eat bon bons and watch my stories...
Delurk.
Good luck with that shredding thing. Gah! My Wii's been screaming to be hooked up for months.
Howdy, sometimes I lurk, and sometimes I comment. Love that you are writing more!
Delurking! Just wait until you turn 50...that poundage just keeps packing on...sigh.
I got out of gym class by running track - then I could hide in the library during gym class. It was the best of both worlds. Congrats on quitting smoking and good luck with the shred.
*waves* Hi, Delurking today! And I feel your pain. I recently switched to kickboxing because I started to have dreams about how I might torture Jillian, should I ever meet her in person. I figured for the betterment of all mankind, I'd switch to kickboxing. (Maybe so I'd actually have the "moves" to "show" her, not that I'm still dreaming about that.) Anyway, I'm not really psycho, I just have weird dreams. *nods*
Happy Delurking Day! Now I'm going back to the shadows :)
Best. Review. Ever.
I'm not a shredhead, not yet. I just started this whole weight loss gig and I am SO not to that point yet. I'm honestly impressed if I can make it up the stairs without my knee giving out on me.
I went to an E-town taping of a BNL show years ago; they took questions from the audience and I asked them the about the coconut-laden swallow; they all froze for a long time and then I think they said, "42." Greetings from Denver!
I'm not sure if I'm delurking or re-lurking. I honestly can't remember if I've commented on your site before. Maybe? Anyhoo, spying on your from Portland, OR. Mama of two gorgeous girls. Baked goods are my kryptonite. I keep thinking to myself, "If I can just stop eating pastries/cookies, etc. every day, then I could get rid of this muffin top." But alas, I have 0 will power. Fortunately I inherited good genes (and metabolism) from my dad, so I can eat like that without too much worry. But, I'm sure it won't last forever. Good luck with the Shred. I've heard it's brutal.
Out of the closet, and you are my hero for shredding it. My heart is free of holes and I can't hack that shit.
xox
Delurking from Melbourne (AU)..
I'm now officially freaked about the Shred - it doesn't sound as though moving the still shrink-wrapped DVD from the shelf to the DVD player and back again is part of the workout. I may have to rethink my approach!
I'm here. Not as often as I'd like to be, but I'm here!
Just now getting back into Shred but alternating it with Jillian's Yoga Meltdown & running, too. Jillian Michaels is trying to torture me, but strangely enough, I like it ...
I haven't tried 30d shred yet, I probably should though. Happy Delurking day!
I'm delurking. Are you happy? Gawd!
So I totally don't even own a scale, much less get on one, AND take a picture documenting the entire miserable experience (for me at least). You're my hero!
It may just be the cold meds, but I'm fairly certainly that scale says 1772.
I've declared 2011 to be The Year of Abs, Ass and Arms. It doesn't seem to be agreeing with me. Yet.
I am just thrilled that your number in within 10 of mine because you are super hot and that means maybe I have a chance too.
Delurking... and now I'm going to Google 30 day shred...I'm so out of the loop! Am I the only one who doesn't know what Shred is?
Good luck with the Shred.
Not really delurking, but I've not been very vocal lately. I like to think of it as stalking.
First off, you have had one hell of a year, so cut yourself some slack, please. Secondly, you are adorable. Thirdly, I delurk. Have fun shredding!