Fool-Proof Holiday Diet Plan

At 11 pm on Sunday night, I realized that I had no clue whatsoever where 1of3's Easter basket was. Now, I'd be fooling myself if I said he actually believed in the Easter Bunny still, but I'm certainly not about to be the one to out the nail in that coffin. I've already more-or-less ruined Santa and the Tooth Fairy; I'm holding on to that damn bunny with all I've got.

So there I was, Saturday night, Easter Eve, 11 pm, and no basket for the 11-ish year old.  And so I did what any normal, sane person would do...I went to Walmart.  And yep, it was closed.  And yep, I know you knew that already.  Shut up.  So then I went to Canadian Superstore, which is kind of like Target's bastard red-headed step brother, and yep.  They were closed, too.  Then, obviously, I went to Safeway.  Because I'm a genius, that's why.

I got out of the car at about 11:30 and started walking to the door.  Two drunk guys were dicking around in the crates outside the store.  The one drunk guy said, "Dooooode, you're totally stuck!  Do you need some help? *burb*" and the other drunk guy said, "Fuck you, dude!  Fuck you, crate!  Fuck you, fat chick in the white pants!"  I turned to the left, I turned to my right, I looked down at My. White. Pants.  Then I died.

Drunk guys still realize I'm fat.  Great.

I gave up, went home, left out a wine bag full of treats for 1of3 and went to bed.  And I didn't eat one single piece of Easter candy today.  Yet.

PaintingPainting With His Daddy2 Juice Boxes and  a Microphone
The whole set's on FlickR. If you're into that sort of thing.