Accidentally, A Post About People Who Clearly Have Little Sense of Self Worth

I'm having a bit of an internal conflict with today's post.  I mean, there's some pretty big stuff going on in our nation right now, in my hometown.  (Yes, I know yesterday I was all, I'm from Delaware! and today I'm all, WhutWhut, Denver representin, yo! but I am from both.  Let's move on.)  I am more tuned in to this electoral race than I was even prepared to be, and I can't seem to get it off my mind.  And Hillary's speech last night?  Well, let's just say that I am kind of quietly hoping that none of her followers listen to her and there's a bit of a surprise for everyone come Thursday.  I was never sold on her before, but today I am.

So, I want to talk about the convention.  I want to talk about our country.  I want to talk about important things.  I also want to talk about babysitting.  I'm torn.

Since I leave in about 30 hours for Denver, I figured I'd give the babysitter talk a shot, and save myself for the trip home, when I could tell you all the fabulous things I saw and heard whilst mingling with the dead sexiest group of bloggers the world has ever known.  But then, oh, but then, something came up, and I decided to do both.

My dear friend Stephen is out and about Denver mocking covering the protests in Denver for Pajamas Media.  Stephen is a republican, he drinks scotch, and he's kind of a jerk when he wants to be.  We have NOTHING in common (maybe except that jerk bit. Bygones), but I love him and I read him religiously because, well, no one can make me laugh at myself better than he can.  He's brilliant, and he always remembers to tell me I look pretty.  I'm a chick, and quite susceptible to flattery.  I digress.

Anyway, Stephen was downtown at the mint, filming some protesters doing something completely ridiculous for his video debut on Pajamas Media, when he tripped and fell on an event that I can only describe as the reason I am not registered as a Democrat, and the reason I'm really reluctant to call myself one in public.  This asshole?  Is giving us all a bad name.  And has no respect for others.  Especially women.  Even women who's politics I abhor; she's still a woman, and still a human.  Go watch.  Watch it all.  It's terrible in that Oh My God This Tastes Like Shit You HAVE To Try It way.

Next, babysitters.  I am doing something I've never ever done before; I am leaving my children in the care of a 14 year old for TEN STRAIGHT hours on Thursday so I can fly 1600 miles and throw a party.  I am kind of scared shitless about the whole thing.  She's quite capable, and very loving to the baby, but still.  10 hours straight with my kids and I'm hitting the liquor cabinet.  What's this poor girl going to do?

Anyway, I had to make sure the Babysitter Instructions were still on the fridge, and indeed they were, and as I reviewed them I realized that maybe I ought to share them with you.  Because maybe you need to make a babysitter instruction list, and maybe I can help you out with that.  I'm a giver.  Here we go, copied straight from the sheet on the fridge, I promise:
The BLT Instruction Manual (My kids initials spell a sandwich.  I like food)

  1. Don't kill them, please.  I've been waiting for 10 years; I have dibs.

  2. Don't let them have candy.  Unless you are on great medication or don't value your sanity.

  3. Bedtime is at 9, 8:30 if you start prematurely aging.

  4. They can read in bed with their lights on.  No, they may not read Playboy.

That's about it.  Thanks, dude!

Yes, that is the whole list, excluding our phone numbers, which nice try, but you have to work way harder than that to get my digits.

One question: As much as I love Little Ms Sitter, she is one of those girls that refuses to name her price.  Which annoys me to no end.  Have a little sense of self value, already.  Besides, I don't know what the exchange rate is from shoulder shrug to CAD.  My question is this: Normally, we pay $10/hour for sitting.  But there's no way I'm giving a 14 year old $100 for one day's work.  No way in hell.  I don't make $100 in a day, and I'm betting most of you don't, either.  So, what do I pay her for a 10 hour day of chasing my toddler, playing my Wii, eating my chips and making sure the boys have bandaids and cookies?

The Last Post About the Rocky Mountain Blogger Bash, I Swear (with my fingers crossed behind my back)

In 6 short days, I will hop on an airplane, fly over the Rocky Mountains, and land in my homesweethome.  I will hop in a cab at Denver International Airport, haul ass downtown, curl my hair in the bathroom of a wine bar, slip on some fishnets and throw the best party the world has ever known, or ever will know.

Or something like that.  I swear I'm bringing a toothbrush.

Anyways, The Rocky Mountain Blogger Bash 5000, Donkeys Over Denver, is August 28th at 7:30 pm at the bar I worked at for, like, FOUR years, Trios Enoteca.  There will be food.  There will be booze.  A lot of that will be free.  F-R-E-E.

You can thank,, and my personal soft spot, for getting me drunk and probably knocked up providing all those amazing bloggers with a few break-the-ice drinks and some snacks.

Please, if you do nothing else today, click through to those links.  You can totally turn your girl scout pin if you do.  They are SAVING MY ASS, yo.  I love them all more than chocolate.

If you're feeling really crazy, you can throw our little animated gif (thank you RWTY Sam, Will @GamingWith Baby, Ender @RedMonkey, Ryzun13, Matt @RedSparks, Justin Rummel and BusyDad for helping and/or offering to help me with that) (my friends ROCK, yo) on your sidebar. 

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Here's the code:

a href=""><img src="" width="160" height="160" border="0" alt="make avatar" /></a

(Add a bracket on the beginning and end of that, okay?)

If you happen to be in Denver next Thursday, pleasepleaseplease come by, grab a beer, and say hi.  I am missing the birthday party of the dead sexiest man I've ever met in my whole life to throw this party; I will need distraction. *wink*

And yeah, let's take the White House back, shall we?  GO BLUE.

Hey, Baby...Are You A Member of the Mile High Club?

While I'm waiting on pictures from my camera, I might as well tell y'all about this:

Donkeys Over Denver

David and I are officially ready to announce the

Rocky Mountain Blogger Bash 5000 : Donkeys Over Denver

The website is up and running, with a spiffy header designed by the always lovely Aimee Greeblemonkey, Trios Enoteca is booked for the night, there's a keg waiting for us from Wynkoop Brewery, we've got Lijit officially sponsoring the event, and there's a rumour that my old buddies at CreBuzz might help us fund our little event, too.

Which would rock.

Because we don't have enough booze yet.

And booze is going to be really, crucially important in a room full of democrats AND republicans.

The official details are:

August 28, 2008
Trios Enoteca
1730 Wynkoop·Denver, CO 80202
7:30 PM to Close

Free Food and Free Beer & Wine
(In limited supplies and only if we like you.)

RSVP and get additional info available at our website.

Please, if you wouldn't mind passing along the info to anyone you know who will be at the convention, near the convention, affected by the convention or thirsty after the convention, we'd be really grateful.