Cause and Effect; A Cautionary Photostudy for the Modern Housewife

What happens when you lose your brand new tube of deodorant? 5 times in one week? You give up and use your son's instead.

And your 13 year old girl-heart really likes it.

What happens when you get all hasty and wash the chocolate brown bath mat on hot with the white one?

You learn to like lavender. Or live without a bathmat. Either way, really.

What happens when you get a hair up your ass to "get all the ironing done"?

You stare at this pile on the couch. All. Week. Long. That doesn't seem to get smaller ever.

What happens when you give up, admit that you just don't have a green thumb, and totally ignore your sad, pathetic, dead plants?

You name your basil plant Lazarus, because you'll be damned if that sucker isn't starting to come back to life all by its own self.

What happens when you and your husband do way to much crack one day and then decide to buy a brand new sectional couch?

You end up kicking yourselves, quite hard, in the hind-quarters when your toddler who has just graduated to a big girl bed gets up in the middle of the night and does THIS.

That would be sharpie. On a WHITE couch. (And PS? I have one two year old for sale cheap.)

What happens when you come to the sad realization that you live on the planet Vogon after you go to the doctor and are told that your health insurance has expired, even though you totally submitted all the proper paperwork, in triplicate, over a month ago?

You self-medicate your urinary tract infection. Which goes down much better than antibiotics anyway.

See all of Lotus' Weekly Winners here.